21 Things .20

Imagination

The other night during dinner, my family was reminiscing over the days when my sister and I played pretend. 
We could play for hours and hours without a thought to time, but sometimes we had to return from our imaginary worlds quickly if we were called to supper or bed. In such moments my mom remembers coming upon our toys and sets left mid-play waiting expectantly for our return, and loving the little glimpse into our lives and imaginations.
Life was pretty simple...For awhile my biggest dream was to have my dad build a wooden house for my little pioneer figurines. I'd draw sketches of the curtains, the "garden" I would plant for them outside, and the meals they'd make. Dad did make me my house - I was never able to make it quite as elaborate as I'd envisioned it, but I was content.

Its been said that "play is the work of childhood," (Jean Piaget) which is very true, or at least should be true. Play is important. Although we were deep in the land of imagination we were really exploring and building upon our understanding of the world...

There was the bubble factory my sister and I created in the backyard under the deck. We'd first be the receptionist and gather the orders (who wouldn't want to order custom made bubbles?!). Then we'd mix food colouring into bubble liquid. It didn't change the colour of the actual bubbles, but it was the idea that counted.

Then there were the times we drew chalk roads, gas stations, and buildings and played town and cops and robbers. The jail was the garage.

There were the countless videos my sister and I created of the news, the silly skits we performed in the living room, and the birthday parties we'd throw for our stuffies.

Once we built forts out of pillows with my cousin and burrowed in them like foxes and moles (we could never convince my sister to be anything less than a unicorn).

Its good to remember these things. I'm thankful for playmates and my parents who encouraged and celebrated our use of imagination!

Do you have any special memories of make-believe?

21 Things .19

A Collection of Quotes Part II

Again, these are really random, but thought provoking nonetheless :)

"I have never let my schooling interfere with my education." - Mark Twain

"It may be that the night will close over us in the end, but I believe that morning will come again. Morning always grows out of the darkness, though maybe not for the people who saw the sun go down." - Lantern Bearers, Rosemary Sutcliff

"Electric communication will never be a substitute for the face of someone who with their soul encourages another person to be brave and true." - Charles Dickens

"'That's a lovely idea, Diana,' said Anne enthusiastically. 'Living so that you beautify your name, even if it wasn't beautiful to begin with...making it stand in people's thoughts for something so lovely and pleasant that they never think of it by itself." - Anne of Avonlea, L. M. Montgomery

"We must be ready to allow ourselves to be interrupted by God." 
- Bonhoeffer

21 Things .18

A Common Thread

You may have noticed a common thread weaving its way through many of my 21 Things posts. It wasn't intentional, but the majority of my musings relate to literature or art in some way. They reveal what speaks to me, and most importantly how God speaks to me. Books certainly don't replace the revelation of His Word, but Jesus demonstrates that it is in God's character to interact uniquely with each individual, especially since he is the one who created us to be unique. Think of how different the people were who encountered Jesus, like Zacchaeus, the Samaritan woman at the well, or the disciples. John, known as "the disciple whom Jesus loved (John 19:26)" was given special insight into the depth of that love, while Peter's impetuosity and fear was met by Jesus' firm but tender question: "do you love me?" (John 21:16). They had unique gifts and struggles yet Jesus was speaking to both of them, equipping them for the tasks ahead.

~

Eric Liddell, the 1924 Olympic gold medalist said: "God made me fast. And when I run, I feel his pleasure." 
Well, I feel God's pleasure when I read (and dance! - but that's a topic for another day).

I've always enjoyed reading, but I've struggled lately to reconcile it as a skill. 
When I was younger I could measure my reading abilities by the expectations of the school system. Reading a book for ages 12-14 when I was 9 gave me confidence. It was always the content of the book that was of most importance, but reading something bigger or unique for my age instigated enjoyable conversations with friends and strangers alike. Yet now that I'm older, books are not measured by their level, only by their genre, and sitting in a public place with a book in hand doesn't draw conversation. I miss that.
There are countless stories that have shaped the landscape of my mind, but the more that I read, the more I realize how little I've read and how little I know, and how little I'll ever know.

It reminds me of a statement made in Dandelion Wine by Ray Bradbury:

"The first thing you learn in life is you're a fool. The last thing you learn in life is you're the same fool." 

Reading teaches critical thinking and empathy, but unlike painting or playing an instrument or a sport, they are skills not easily visible. Despite this, I will continue to read, to learn and to listen.

Its comforting to know that God uses fools :)

~

We all have skills that bring us joy and satisfaction, drawing us to look beyond ourselves. 
What makes you feel God's pleasure?

21 Things .17

Chasing After the Wind

This week I've been reading Tender is the Night by F. Scott Fitzgerald, and though I find his dialogue style rather hard to follow, every once in awhile a bold line or descriptive phrase will arrest me with its poignancy - often I have to reread it a few times to get it, but that satisfying "aha!" moment is worth the attempt!

One of the earlier chapters in the novel describes the characters attending a private screening of a silent film with their friend the lead actress. Their dialogue is crafted in such a way as to capture the frivolous and superficial culture of the Roaring 20's. 
They say everything and yet nothing. 
Yet when the actress offers Dick Divers a screen test he refuses and the dialogue turns serious when he states:

"The strongest guard is placed at the gateway to nothing... Maybe because the condition of emptiness is too shameful to be divulged."

He's speaking of Hollywood and his words are maybe even more applicable today almost a hundred years later.

The American Dream.
Rags to riches, the desire to be "known" by the world, and the anticipated wealth and bright lights are empty pursuits, and yet they remain alluring in a strange and twisted way. 

A more contemporary example would be La La Land, a beautiful movie created in the spirit and colour of old musical classics, but one that leaves the viewer (at least me) unsettled. The characters have chosen their dreams over each other and despite their individual successes, there is that same, unmistakable "condition of emptiness." 

I'm reminded of Ecclesiastes 2:3-4, 10-11
“I tried cheering myself with wine, and embracing folly… I denied myself nothing my eyes desired; I refused my heart no pleasure… I made great works. I built houses and planted vineyards for myself…Yet when I surveyed all that my hands had done and what I had toiled to achieve, everything was meaningless, a chasing after the wind; nothing was gained under the sun.”

21 Things .16

A Collection of Quotes Part I

The title is rather self explanatory :) 
Below are a few random, thought-provoking quotes that I've highlighted in my reading. 
One of my pet peeves is when quotes are taken out of context (especially online) or attributed to the author instead of their character, but I also understand the power of brevity. 
Isn't it amazing how so much can be said with so few words?!

"The greatest happiness of life is the conviction that we are loved - loved for ourselves, or rather, loved in spite of ourselves." - Les Miserables, Victor Hugo

"Procrastination is the thief of time, collar him." David Copperfield, Charles Dickens.

"A man can no more diminish God's glory by refusing to worship Him than a lunatic can put out the sun by scribbling the word 'darkness' on the walls of his cell." - The Problem of Pain, C. S. Lewis

"Earth's crammed with heaven,
And every common bush afire with God,
But only he who sees takes off his shoes;
The rest sit round and pluck blackberries."
- Elizabeth Barrett Browning

"It is our choices, Harry, that show what we truly are, far more than our abilities." - Dumblerdore in Harry Potter and the Philosophers Stone, J. K. Rowling

21 Things .15

Impressions of Impressionism

This weekend, at the suggestion of a very thoughtful friend, I took myself to an art gallery to see an exhibit of Claude Monet's paintings!

My overall impression (no pun intended) was one of quiet awe. As I entered the first room, crowded with sightseers huddled in clumps around gilded frames, my eyes welled up with tears (on more than a few occasions). 
Such emotion wasn't unexpected, but I wondered, was I crying because I was seeing these original, revered works of art in person? My immediate answer was no - although it was an incredible and surreal experience, the idea of seeing one of my favourite artist's work stirred in me jittery excitement more than anything. Why then?
It took me the entire visit to sift through my thoughts, and I slowly but surely came to the realization that I was overcome by the sense of life in his work - almost a palpable presence in the room.
Now that may sound rather silly but let me explain...

As I gazed at the first painting I wondered whether I would have enjoyed it if I didn't know Monet had painted it. The truthful answer was that, no, I wouldn't even glance twice at some of his more abstract pieces. With this realization I felt a bit ashamed because I'm taught, especially with Modern Art to be able to appreciate art for the sake of art, or to find the art's message entirely in the (often ambiguous) piece itself. Many modern pieces go so far as to expect the viewer to find the meaning simply in what they personally make of it. In Modern Art, I often get the sense that the artist as a person is distant from their artwork and subsequently the viewer. 
Now Modern Art certainly intrigues me, and there are contemporary pieces that have moved me deeply, but they have yet to speak to my soul as Monet's paintings. 
After all these thoughts rushed through my head, I flushed as the shame was replaced with the thrill of understanding that liking Monet's work because it was painted by Monet is okay. The Impressionist's work was revolutionary, and in fact paved the way for modern art, and yet they painted what they loved. Understanding their journey enhances my appreciation. Monet's life story is inseparable from his work.

So for me, my love of Impressionist art and my walk through the gallery that day was a biographical one. To be able to see the bold and dancing brush strokes and the texture of paint that created the illusion of flickering colours of nature (sometimes Monet mixed sand from the beach into his paint when he was capturing beach scenes, and he never used black, believing it wasn't a natural colour of nature). Such things revealed Monet's pioneering genius. But at the same time I was surprised by the simplicity of some of his work, and his inadequate renderings of the world. When looking at his pictures online, the incomplete corners of canvases are omitted. 
So yes, I got to see the work of an artist I have long admired, but he is just a man after all - imperfect and incapable of capturing what he saw.

He knew better than anyone that trying to capture the light as he desired was impossible. "Quite beyond my powers", he said, and yet (and this is what I find so beautiful) he painted anyway. He exuded a quiet resilience that kept him at his easel even as he began to go blind, and when the battlefront of World War I encroached on his garden in Giverny. 
"I would much rather die here" he said, "in the middle of what I have done."

Getting a glimpse of the world through Monet's perceptive eyes is a testament to the fact that one human soul is truly an epic on the grandest scale.

21 Things .14

Role Models and Wonder

We all have our role models. Some of them are close mentors and family members and continue to influence us our entire lives, others we admire from afar or are only influenced by for a season. Whatever the case, we can conclude that role models have a lasting impact.

As a six year old still new to the school playground, I remember a group of Grade 6 kids who'd talk to little me and sometimes walk me home from school. Their attention made me feel so special and I thought it would be grand to be their age!

Then Grade 6 came along and I definitely didn't feel as grown up as I'd envisioned them. In fact, its one of those years that I find most difficult to recall. It was a great year but not strikingly so.

Then there were the years following in which I looked up to specific camp and youth leaders. Some I saw weekly, others only for a short week, but whatever the case, I was always struck by their confidence and willingness to include me in their lives. 

Having now served in many camp and leadership roles, all I can say is that its very different. Where was my confidence? I wondered. Why was I so tired? 

Don't get me wrong; such leadership experiences were wonderful but I never did feel like I thought my leaders had felt.

There were also countless times that I watched The Sound of Music (a favourite), and it got me wondering with anticipation what it would be like to finally be able to sing that I was "sixteen turning on seventeen! 

Again, definitely not the same! 

You're probably noticing a theme here :)

~

It was a painfully slow day at work today and my mind was muddled with summer allergies and the doldrums of a hot, stuffy room. Then a young family walked in and the memories I have just been describing rushed over me. It was the kids that sparked them. They came rushing into the museum ahead of their parents, practically running with excitement and saying hello to me before I had a chance to greet them.

"So you've come to have a look at the museum?" I said, trying to emerge from my foggy brain.

"Yes! We're so excited!" the boy exclaimed. He was about nine years old. "We love mines - I mean, we love learning about history, and since mining is a part of that, we like it too!" 

I took "we" to mean his sister and him.

Kindred spirits! My heart warmed as I talked briefly with this brother and sister. Not often do you meet kids who walks into a museum like its an amusement park!

After their parents had paid I opened the old cash register to put away the change. "Cha-ching." 

The siblings were peeking up over the counter and they gasped in unison at the sound. "Wow!" the girl said softly, "You're so lucky!" 

You're so lucky.

Those were the words that really struck me. I saw my younger self in her place, watching a young lady put cash into an old historic cash register and admiring her and her job. 

I definitely didn't feel "lucky" today, but her words gave me a new perspective. It made me realize that although the world and the unknown continue to get bigger as I grow, I get the opportunity to be in a position I would have admired as a young girl. Today I was reminded of the wonder and expectancy of childhood as well as the fact that role models don't often know that they are role models and seldom do they feel like one, and I'm thankful for that.

P.S. Only one year to go until I can sing Taylor Swifts "22" :P